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Sri Lanka Equity Forum » Stock Market Entertainment » Stock Market Entertainment

Stock Market Entertainment

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1 Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Sep 22, 2011 8:50 am

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
First topic message reminder :

There will be Short Stories,Song,Poet Saying....
Anything found made us fun? It will be public Here daily as possible....

If any thing You may aware.. let others to enjoy

Your contribution to this tread for beneficially of all the users Is highly appreciated...



Last edited by SL.Market on Thu Sep 22, 2011 8:52 am; edited 1 time in total


81 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Sun Nov 20, 2011 10:30 pm

Kithsiri


Senior Vice President - Equity Analytics
Senior Vice President - Equity Analytics
Only in Sri Lanka Very Happy
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82 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Mon Nov 21, 2011 4:52 pm

sriranga


Co-Admin
Experienced economist and not so experienced economist are walking down the road. They come across a pile of horse manure lying on the asphalt.

Experienced economist: "If you eat it I'll give you $20,000!"
Not so experienced economist runs his optimization problem and figures out he's better off eating it so he does and collects money.

Continuing along the same road they come across another pile of horse manure.
Not so experienced economist: "Now, if YOU eat this I’ll give YOU $20,000."
After evaluating the proposal experienced economist eats it and collects the money.

They go on. The not so experienced economist starts thinking: "Listen, we both have the same amount of money we had before, but we both ate horse manure. I don't see us being better off."

The experienced economist replies "Well, that's true, but you overlooked the fact that we've been just involved in $40,000 of trade."

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

83 Marriage Jokes on Tue Nov 22, 2011 1:04 pm

sriranga


Co-Admin
Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want then, when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --
Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --
Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --
It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged.
It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --
It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as women and then he turns them into Wives.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ----
If u r married please ignore this msg,
for everyone else: Happy Independence Day
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ----
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say.
After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ----
There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ----
Girlfriends r like chocolates,
taste good anytime.
Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.
Husbands r like Dal RICE, eaten when there's no choice.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---
Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ----
Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man, The Master of Women'?
Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---

There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he would go through hell for her. They got married and now he is going thru hell.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ----
Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life!
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ----
Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?
A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offence!

Source: via email

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

84 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Tue Nov 22, 2011 1:35 pm

bakapandithaya


Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
good one, sriranga, thnkx for sharing

85 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Tue Nov 22, 2011 2:26 pm

sriranga


Co-Admin

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

86 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Tue Nov 22, 2011 6:40 pm

SL.Market

avatar
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
No:64





87 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Wed Nov 23, 2011 4:13 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
No:65



88 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Nov 24, 2011 1:03 am

sriranga

avatar
Co-Admin
The stock markets now are like an old man's d*** ?
Just refusing to rise, and the irony is that everyone is still getting f****d!
Source: via email

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

89 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Nov 24, 2011 9:10 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics














90 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Sat Nov 26, 2011 4:06 pm

sriranga

avatar
Co-Admin
Two men, one American and a Maasai were sitting in a bar and discussing about their family problems.

The Maasai man said to the American, "We have a problem. In our community we can't marry the one whom we love, You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven't even met once. We call this arranged marriage. I don't want to marry a woman whom I don't love... I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems."

The American said, "Talking about love marriages... In America We can marry the one whom we love ......I'll tell you my story. I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years. After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step- daughter and married her, so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father's father-in-law. Legally now my daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother. More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father's brother and so he is my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father's son, my brother is my grandson. Ultimately, I have become my own grandfather and I am my own grandson. AND YOU SAY YOU HAVE FAMILY PROBLEMS!!"

The Maasai fainted........!!!

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

91 WHEN A WOMEN LIES.....Oh! My God!!!‏ on Wed Nov 30, 2011 3:05 am

sriranga

avatar
Co-Admin
One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river.
When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, 'My dear child, why are you crying?'
The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family.

The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with sapphires.

'Is this your thimble?' the Lord asked . The seamstress replied, 'No.'

The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a golden thimble studded with rubies.

'Is this your thimble?' the Lord asked. Again, the seamstress replied, 'No.'

The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble.

'Is this your thimble ?' the Lord asked. The seamstress replied, 'Yes.'

The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.

Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and disappeared under the water.

When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, 'Why are you crying?' 'Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river!'

The Lord went down into the water and came up with George Clooney. 'Is this your husband?' the Lord asked.

'Yes,' cried the seamstress. The Lord was furious. 'You lied! That is an untruth!'

The seamstress replied, 'Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to George Clooney, you would have come up with Brad Pitt.

Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband.

Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I'm not in the best of health and would not be able to take care of all three husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to George Clooney.

And so the Lord let her keep him.

The moral of this story is: Whenever a woman lies, it's for a good and honorable reason, and in the best interest of others.
sticking to it.

source: via email

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

92 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Wed Nov 30, 2011 7:01 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics


93 Brilliant Advertisement on Wed Nov 30, 2011 11:22 pm

sriranga

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Co-Admin


Source: via email

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

94 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Sun Dec 04, 2011 11:54 pm

sriranga

avatar
Co-Admin
A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon!!!!

Four worms were placed into four separate jars.

The first worm was put into a container of alcohol.
The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke.
The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup.
The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil.


At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results:

The first worm in alcohol - Dead.

The second worm in cigarette smoke - Dead

Third worm in chocolate syrup - Dead

Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive.


So the Minister asked the congregation -


What can you learn from this demonstration?


Maxine was sitting in the back, quickly raised her hand and said,

'As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won't have worms!'

That pretty much ended the service --

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

95 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Tue Dec 06, 2011 7:38 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics


















96 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Wed Dec 07, 2011 5:15 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics







97 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Dec 08, 2011 11:09 am

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics



98 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Fri Dec 09, 2011 1:39 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics

99 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Mon Dec 12, 2011 3:27 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
No:77



100 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Tue Dec 13, 2011 4:10 pm

2011_NewComer

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Senior Manager - Equity Analytics
Senior Manager - Equity Analytics
Mind your language Very Happy

101 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Dec 15, 2011 5:41 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics







102 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Fri Dec 16, 2011 11:34 am

SL.Market

avatar
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Try Before You Buy!

Myra was going to the Christmas office party but needed a new party dress.

In the clothing store she asked, 'May I try on that dress in the window, please?'

'Certainly not, madam,' responded the salesgirl, 'You'll have to use the fitting room like everyone else.'

103 It's Hell to be Old on Sat Dec 17, 2011 2:28 pm

sriranga

avatar
Co-Admin
OLD people have problems that you haven't even considered yet!

An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam.

The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take his jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.'

The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.

The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, 'Well, doc, it's like this -- first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.

'Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in,then with her teeth out, still nothing.

'We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezing' it between her knees, but still nothing.'

The doctor was shocked!
'You asked your neighbour?'

The old man replied,
'Yep, none of us could get the jar open.'

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

104 PUT THE GLASS DOWN TODAY on Mon Dec 19, 2011 7:06 pm

sriranga

avatar
Co-Admin


Read this small story; Hope that makes a BIG change in YOU

The Professor began his class by holding up a glass with some water in it. He held it up for all to see & asked the students “How much do you think this glass weighs?" '50gms!'..... '100gms!' .....'125gms' ...the students answered. "I really don't know unless I weigh it," said the professor, "but, my question is: What would happen if I held it up like this for a few minutes?" 'Nothing' …..the students said. 'Ok what would happen if I held it up like this for an hour?' the professor asked. 'Your arm would begin to ache' said one of the student "You're right, now what would happen if I held it for a day?" "Your arm could go numb; you might have severe muscle stress & paralysis & have to go to hospital for sure!" ….. Ventured another student & all the students laughed "Very good. But during all this, did the weight of the glass change?" Asked the professor. 'No'…. Was the answer. "Then what caused the arm ache & the muscle stress?" The students were puzzled. "What should I do now to come out of pain?" asked professor again. "Put the glass down!" said one of the students "Exactly!" said the professor.

Life's problems are something like this. Hold it for a few minutes in your head & they seem OK. Think of them for a long time & they begin to ache. Hold it even longer & they begin to paralyze you. You will not be able to do anything.

It's important to think of the challenges or problems in your life, But EVEN MORE IMPORTANT is to 'PUT THEM DOWN' at the end of every day before you go to sleep... That way, you are not stressed, you wake up every day fresh &strong & can handle any issue, any challenge that comes your way!

So, when you start your day today, Remember friend to ‘PUT THE GLASS DOWN TODAY! '

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

105 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Mon Dec 19, 2011 7:21 pm

bakapandithaya

avatar
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
@sriranga wrote:

Read this small story; Hope that makes a BIG change in YOU

The Professor began his class by holding up a glass with some water in it. He held it up for all to see & asked the students “How much do you think this glass weighs?" '50gms!'..... '100gms!' .....'125gms' ...the students answered. "I really don't know unless I weigh it," said the professor, "but, my question is: What would happen if I held it up like this for a few minutes?" 'Nothing' …..the students said. 'Ok what would happen if I held it up like this for an hour?' the professor asked. 'Your arm would begin to ache' said one of the student "You're right, now what would happen if I held it for a day?" "Your arm could go numb; you might have severe muscle stress & paralysis & have to go to hospital for sure!" ….. Ventured another student & all the students laughed "Very good. But during all this, did the weight of the glass change?" Asked the professor. 'No'…. Was the answer. "Then what caused the arm ache & the muscle stress?" The students were puzzled. "What should I do now to come out of pain?" asked professor again. "Put the glass down!" said one of the students "Exactly!" said the professor.

Life's problems are something like this. Hold it for a few minutes in your head & they seem OK. Think of them for a long time & they begin to ache. Hold it even longer & they begin to paralyze you. You will not be able to do anything.

It's important to think of the challenges or problems in your life, But EVEN MORE IMPORTANT is to 'PUT THEM DOWN' at the end of every day before you go to sleep... That way, you are not stressed, you wake up every day fresh &strong & can handle any issue, any challenge that comes your way!

So, when you start your day today, Remember friend to ‘PUT THE GLASS DOWN TODAY! '

Sri according 2 my knowledge, u r da most active member & u r spending more time 2 educate others. u shld b promoted 2 moderators with immediate effect. Here some moderators only for moving da topic frm here & there. Twisted Evil

106 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Tue Dec 20, 2011 3:40 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
No:83

A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a Rupee 500 note.

In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this Rupee 500 note?"

Hands started going up. He said, "I am going to give this note to one of you

but first let me do this." He proceeded to crumple the note up.

He then asked, "Who still wants it?"

Still the hands were up in the air.

"Well," he replied, "What if I do this?" And he dropped it on the ground and
started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now all
crumpled and dirty. "Now who still wants it?"
Still the hands went into the air.

"My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson.
No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not
decrease in value. It was still worth Rupee 500/-.

Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt
by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as
though we are worthless.
But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose
your value.

You are special. Don't ever forget it! Never let yesterday's disappointments overshadow tomorrow's dreams.

" VALUE HAS A VALUE ONLY IF ITS VALUE IS VALUED "

107 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Tue Dec 20, 2011 8:14 pm

bakapandithaya

avatar
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
good one slmkt, shock for panic sellers

108 Value of human capital on Wed Dec 21, 2011 5:19 pm

sriranga

avatar
Co-Admin
Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.

Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:

Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.

Postulate 2: Time is Money.


As every engineer knows,

Work
---------- = Power
Time


Since Knowledge = Power, and Time =Money, we have

Work
--------- = Knowledge
Money


Solving for Money, we get:

Work
----------- = Money
Knowledge

Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.

Conclusion: The Less you Know, the more money you Make.

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

109 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Dec 22, 2011 3:38 pm

SL.Market

avatar
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Before marriage:

He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.

She: Do you want me to leave?

He: NO! Don't even think about it.

She: Do you love me?

He: Of course!

She: Have you ever cheated on me?

He: NO! Why you even asking?

She: Will you kiss me?

He: Yes!

She: Will you hit me?

He: No way! I'm not such kind of person!

She: Can I trust you?

He: Yes.

Now after the marriage you can read it from below to top.

110 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:26 am

SL.Market

avatar
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Q.(1) How do you know Santa has to be a man?
Ans. No woman is going to wear the same outfit year after year.

Q.(2) Why is Christmas just like a day at the office ?
Ans. You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

Q.(3) What do monkeys sing at Christmas ?
Ans. Jungle Bells, Jungle bells.. !

Q.(4) What do you give a train driver for Christmas ?
Ans. Platform shoes !

Q.(5) What did the big candle say to the little candle ?
Ans. I'm going out tonight !

Q.(6) What is the best thing to put into a Christmas cake ?
Ans. Your teeth !

Q.(7) What did Adam say on the day before Christmas ?
Ans. It's Christmas, Eve !

Q.(Cool What do you have in December that you don't have in any other month ?
Ans. The letter "D" !

Q.(9) Why did Robin Hood steal from the rich ?
Ans. Because the poor didn't have any !

Q.(10) What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ans. Ice caps!

Q.(11) How can a snowman lose weight?
Ans. He waits until it gets warmer!

Q.(12) What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Ans. Snowflakes.

Q.(13) What goes red white red white red white?
Ans. Father Christmas rolling down a hill!

Q.(14) What do you call a man who claps at Christmas ?
Ans. Santapplause!

Q.(15) What is Father Christmas' wife called ?
Ans. Mary Christmas!

Q.(16) What do you call Santa Claus when he doesn't move?
Ans. Santa Pause!

Q.(17) How many presents can Santa fit into an empty sack?
Ans. Only one - after then it is not empty any more.

Q.(18) What king is the children's favorite at Christmas time?
Ans. A stocking!

Q.(19) What kind of bird can write?
Ans. A pen-guin!

Q.(20) Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
Ans. So he can ho-ho-ho.

111 **Story of Appreciation** on Mon Dec 26, 2011 6:05 pm

sriranga

avatar
Co-Admin
One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company.

He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview, made the last decision.

The director discovered from the CV that the youth's academic achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.

The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarships in school?" the youth answered "none".

The director asked, " Was it your father who paid for your school fees?" The youth answered, "My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my school fees.

The director asked, " Where did your mother work?" The youth answered, "My mother worked as clothes cleaner. The director requested the youth to show his hands. The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect.

The director asked, " Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?" The youth answered, "Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me.

The director said, "I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother's hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.*

The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to the kid.

The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.

This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes everyday to enable him to pay the school fee. The bruises in the mother's hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.

After finishing the cleaning of his mother hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother.

That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.

Next morning, the youth went to the director's office.

The Director noticed the tears in the youth's eyes, asked: " Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?"

The youth answered, " I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes'

The Director asked, " please tell me your feelings."

The youth said, Number 1, I know now what is appreciation. Without my mother, there would not the successful me today. Number 2, by working together and helping my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done. Number 3, I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationship.

The director said, " This is what I am looking for to be my manager. I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired.

Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates. Every employee worked diligently and as a team. The company's performance improved tremendously.

A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would develop "entitlement mentality" and would always put himself first. He would be ignorant of his parent's efforts. When he starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others. For this kind of people, who may be good academically, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement. He will grumble and be full of hatred and fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really showing love or are we destroying the kid instead?*

You can let your kid live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, watch a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowls together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love them in a right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that young person. The most important thing is your kid learns how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learns the ability to work with others to get things done.

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

112 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Tue Dec 27, 2011 1:51 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
No:88

113 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Tue Dec 27, 2011 6:26 pm

Kumar

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Senior Vice President - Equity Analytics
Senior Vice President - Equity Analytics

114 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:35 am

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
No:90


115 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Dec 29, 2011 12:23 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Enjoy with the creation nothing more

116 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Dec 29, 2011 12:36 pm

ddmax

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Equity Analytic
Equity Analytic
එක වසරේ පුංචි කොලු ගැටයෙක්ගෙන් පන්ති භාර ගුරුතුමියට පුදුම වදේලු. ඒ නිසාම ගුරුතුමී ඇයව විදුහල්පති තුමා හමුවට අරන් ගිහින්. එතකොට ඇති වුනු දෙබස තමයි මේ...

විදුහල්පති : මොකද ලමයා මිස්ට කරදර කරනව කියන්නේ?
පොඩ්ඩා : අපේ අක්කා ඉන්නේ 3 වසරේ, ඒ වුනාට මට ෂුවර් එයාට වඩා මගේ මොලේ වැඩි කියලා.
විදුහල්පති : හරි, එහෙනම් මම ඔය ලමයගෙන් දැන් ප්රශ්න ටිකක් අහනවා. ඒවා ඔක්කෝටම හරියට උත්තර දුන්නොත් ඔයාවත් අපි 3 වසරට මාරු කරනවා. කැමතිද?
පොඩ්ඩා : හරි, මම කැමතියි.
විදුහල්පති : 3x3 කීයද?
පොඩ්ඩා : 9
විදුහල්පති : 6x6 කීයද?
පොඩ්ඩා : 36
විදුහල්පති : මම හිතන්නේ මේ ලමයට 3 වසරේ ඉගෙනුම ලබන්න දැනුම ඇති මිස්. මෙයාව අපි 3 වසරට මාරු කරමු.
ගුරුතුමී : හ්ම්, ඒත් සර් අවසර දෙනව නම් මම කැමති මේ ලමයගෙන් තව ප්රශ්න ටිකක් අහන්න. කමක් නෑ නේද?
විදුහල්පති : අහන්න අහන්න, කිසිම ප්රශ්නයක් නෑ.
ගුරුතුමී : එළදෙනකට 4ක් තියෙන මට 2ක් තියෙන දේ මොකද්ද?
පොඩ්ඩා : කකුල්
ගුරුතුමී : ඔයාගෙ කලිසම ඇතුලේ තියෙන, මගේ සාරිය ඇතුලේ නැති දේ මොකද්ද?
පොඩ්ඩා : සාක්කු
ගුරුතුමී : පිරිමි අය හිටගෙන කරන, ගැහැණු අය වාඩි වෙලා කරන, බල්ලෝ කකුල් 3න් කරන දේ මොකද්ද?
විදුහල්පති තුමා දෑස් ලොකු කර බලා සිටී...
පොඩ්ඩා : අතට අත දීම.
ගුරුතුමී : හරි මම දැන් තේරවිලි කිහිපයක් අහන්නම්, සූදානම්ද?
පොඩ්ඩා : සූදානම්
ගුරුතුමී : ඔයාගේ ඇඟිල්ලක් මා තුලට යනවා. ඒත් ඔයාට ඇති වුනාම ඔයා මාව ඇඟිල්ලෙන් ඉවත් කරගන්නවා. මම කවුද?
පොඩ්ඩා : කසාද මුද්ද
ගුරුතුමී : මම එක එක ප්රමාණ වලින් තියෙනවා, මම ලෙඩ වුනාම මගෙන් දියරයක් ශ්රාවය වෙනවා. මම කවුද?
පොඩ්ඩා : නහය
ගුරුතුමී : F අකුරෙන් පටන් ගන්න K අකුරෙන් අවසන් වන ගොඩාක් උණුසුම අන්තර්ගත දේ කුමක්ද?
පොඩ්ඩා : Firework
ගුරුතුමී : F අකුරෙන් පටන් ගන්න K අකුරෙන් අවසන් වන මේ දේ ඔයාට ලැබුනේ නැතොත් අත පාවිච්චි කරන්න සිදු වෙනවා.
පොඩ්ඩා : Fork
ගුරුතුමී : ඔබටත් 1ක් තියෙන්වා, විදුහල්පති තුමාටත් 1ක් තියෙනවා. පාප් වහන්සේ තමන්ගේ 1ක පාවිච්චි කරන්නේ නෑලු. විවාහවෙන කාන්තාවන්ටද 1ක් ලැබේවි. ඒ මොකද්ද?
පොඩ්ඩා : වාසගම
ගුරුතුමී : මිනිසා සතු මෙහි කිසිම අස්ථියක් නෑ. නමුත් විශාල ප්රමාණයක් නහර තියෙනවා. ආදරය කරන්න මේක නැතුව බෑ. ඒ මොකද්ද?
පොඩ්ඩා : හදවත
ගුරුතුමී : හරි සර්, මමත් ප්රශ්න අහල අවසානයි.
විදුහල්පති : අම්මෝ ඇති යන්තම්. අන්තිම ප්රශ්න 10ටම මම හිතපු උත්තරත් වැරදී. මේ ලමයව 4 වසරට නෙවෙයි, විශ්ව විද්යාලයට මම නිර්දේශ කරල අදම ලිව්මක් ලියනවා.

XXX*DD*XXX

117 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Sat Dec 31, 2011 12:33 pm

sriranga

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Co-Admin
Strange English Language facts

He could lead if he would get the lead out.

A farm can produce produce.

The dump was so full it had to refuse refuse.

The soldier decided to desert in the desert.

The present is a good time to present the present.

At the Army base, a bass was painted on the head of a bass drum.

The dove dove into the bushes.

I did not object to the object.

The insurance for the invalid was invalid.

The bandage was wound around the wound.

There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

They were too close to the door to close it.

The buck does funny things when the does are present.

They sent a sewer down to stitch the tear in the sewer line.

To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

After a number of Novocain injections, my jaw got number.

I shed a tear when I saw the tear in my clothes.

I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

I spent last evening evening out a pile of dirt.

We polish the Polish furniture.

And Finally:

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.

English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France.

Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat.

Quicksand can work slowly.

Boxing rings are square and

if vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat??????

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

118 Thought for the New Year Celebration on Sun Jan 01, 2012 5:38 pm

sriranga

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Co-Admin

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

119 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Sun Jan 01, 2012 6:37 pm

kaka


Assistant Vice President - Equity Analytics
Assistant Vice President - Equity Analytics
@sriranga wrote:

lol, good one for new year

120 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Mon Jan 02, 2012 2:55 pm

SL.Market

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Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
2012 Happy New Year For All

In tribute to those who see the world
Not through their eyes.....


But Their hearts




121 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Tue Jan 03, 2012 12:52 am

kaka


Assistant Vice President - Equity Analytics
Assistant Vice President - Equity Analytics
life, one da Sad y we have to go

122 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Wed Jan 04, 2012 1:22 pm

kaka


Assistant Vice President - Equity Analytics
Assistant Vice President - Equity Analytics
@kaka wrote:life, one da Sad y we have to go

Life,one day we have to go back, that means all have to die one day. So, no need to upset by looking @ mkt

123 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Wed Jan 04, 2012 2:56 pm

Academic


Senior Manager - Equity Analytics
Senior Manager - Equity Analytics
@SL.Market wrote:2012 Happy New Year For All

In tribute to those who see the world
Not through their eyes.....


But Their hearts

This is the most touching song I heard recently. Thanks for sharing it.

Below is the Rock version of the song. See the difference. In fact this rock version released first! Following comment was seen in Elakiri community on this rock version.

"මේක චාපයා කරලා තිබුනට මේ ෆීලින් එක ඌට දෙන්න බැරි උනා... මගේ වාසනාවට මම මුලින්ම ඇහුවේ මේඛලාගේ වොයිස් එකෙන්.. පස්සේ තමයි ඉන්ද්රචාප කරපු එක ඇහුවේ.. ඌ කියන හැටි ඇහුවම හොදට ඉන්න මිනිස්සුත් ආබාධිත වෙනවා... " ( http://www.elakiri.com/forum/archive/index.php/t-1253615.html ).

124 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Jan 05, 2012 2:51 pm

SL.Market

avatar
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics
@Academic wrote:
@SL.Market wrote:2012 Happy New Year For All

In tribute to those who see the world
Not through their eyes.....


But Their hearts

This is the most touching song I heard recently. Thanks for sharing it.

Below is the Rock version of the song. See the difference. In fact this rock version released first! Following comment was seen in Elakiri community on this rock version.

"මේක චාපයා කරලා තිබුනට මේ ෆීලින් එක ඌට දෙන්න බැරි උනා... මගේ වාසනාවට මම මුලින්ම ඇහුවේ මේඛලාගේ වොයිස් එකෙන්.. පස්සේ තමයි ඉන්ද්රචාප කරපු එක ඇහුවේ.. ඌ කියන හැටි ඇහුවම හොදට ඉන්න මිනිස්සුත් ආබාධිත වෙනවා... " ( http://www.elakiri.com/forum/archive/index.php/t-1253615.html ).


okay...I will add some more colors to this touching song....


125 Re: Stock Market Entertainment on Thu Jan 05, 2012 3:12 pm

Academic


Senior Manager - Equity Analytics
Senior Manager - Equity Analytics
@SL.Market wrote:

okay...I will add some more colors to this touching song....



Can't see the images. What I see above are two frogs!

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